Surviving a Fender Bender

On September 9^th, I will celebrate my fourth anniversary with Weight Watchers. Has it always been easy? No. Has it always been tough? No. Like all aspects in life, I had, and continue to have, ups and downs. To be honest, I am actually in one of the “downs” right now. What I decided to do to in order to combat the down was do what I do best- write a blog post. As I was formulating this blog post in my mind, I headed to my weekly meeting on Saturday. And wouldn’t you know it, the topic of conversation was “It’s a slip, not a slide.” With that in mind, I present to you “Surviving a Fender Bender.”

We’ve all been driving down the road and seen one, two or maybe even three cars in the median slightly banged up. There’s probably even a squad car there to assess the situation and hand out a ticket or two. As we drive by – in our damage-free cars – we say a little prayer of thanks that it’s not us standing there looking at the bumper hanging off our car. But what if it was? Would it be the end of the road for you? Would you proceed to drive your car completely off the road and into a tree then throw your hands up and say “that’s it, I’m through now. I’ll never be able to drive anywhere, ever again”? No, you’d get on the phone with your insurance company, explain the situation, deal with the consequences (a little higher premiums) and get your car repaired. Then you resume your life.

Why, then, do we punish ourselves so extensively when we have a little slip up and gain a few pounds? It’s a blip on the radar, it’s not the end of the world. Realizing that it’s happening and correcting the problem is key. After losing 150 pounds, gaining 5 of it back sucks. I’m not gonna lie. But that means that I’m still down 145 pounds. Why would I take a fender bender and turn it into a situation where I have to total my car? I won’t. I’ll call the insurance company (in this case, all my Road Trip buddies and WW crew) and I’ll face the consequences (a little higher numbers on the scale), but then, I’ll get my car repaired and I’m gonna get my butt back on the road. I’ve come too far and put in too much blood, sweat and tears to ram my car into a tree now.

So, the next time you find yourself up a little, don’t throw in the towel, use it to wipe some sweat off your face and get back on the road. There will always be peaks and valleys, and the measure of success isn’t how you handle the peaks, it’s how you navigate the valleys.

Take Your Own Journey

I’ve realized something over the last (almost) four years…no matter how well you succeed in striving to hit a goal, you are always comparing yourself to others who have “done better.”  But what does “done better” really mean? Does it mean that someone lost more weight than you? Does it mean someone lost it quicker than you? Does it mean that someone makes more money than you? Well, since we are all human and all in the habit of comparing ourselves to friends, family and co-workers who surround us (and in some cases, we find ourselves making comparisons with people whom we’ve never even met).

There are some good things that can come from these types of comparisons, but for the most part, comparing any accomplishments we make with those of other people is downright useless. I was talking with a neighbor at the grocery store the other day. I noticed that he has lost quite a bit of weight. I know he’s been working on it, as he was attending Weight Watchers meetings periodically and I’ve also seen him walking up and down the main road outside my neighborhood. But I hadn’t seen him in a while, so his weight loss was dramatic and noticeable. Now, I know it can be tricky to mention weight loss to someone, but given the fact that I knew he’d been working on it, I would be remiss not to say something. He thanked me and told me he’d lost about 50 pounds. I congratulated him. Unfortunately, he didn’t leave it there. He went on to compare his accomplishment to mine. I could tell he felt bad that he hasn’t lost as much as I have. He needs to take his own journey, and I told him as much. What he did is a huge accomplishment! He should be shouting it from the rooftops, he should be encouraging others – who are interested – to come along for the ride. He should not be bummed that he hasn’t done what I’ve done.

Now, I have a confession to make. I have to work on this problem with myself! I do look at others who have done more, done it quicker or done it better and I wonder what I could have done differently to change my path. But then, I get random Facebook messages out of the blue from a nationally known magazine and I realize that it doesn’t matter the road that others have taken, because I took the road that I was supposed to take and I am where I’m supposed to be. Sometimes that road was less traveled, but other times it was a full-on traffic jam, but the entirety of that road was mine to travel as I saw fit.

So, I will work on making sure that I don’t try to hitchhike onto someone else’s Road Trip, but I will make sure that I support and encourage everyone along the way. And I hope that you will do the same, because when we all get to where we’re going, it should be one helluva party!

Enrolling in Driver's Ed

Well, will you look at that! It turns out I had one last story to tell for 2014. You see, last week, I was fortunate enough to get lots of outdoor walking worked into my day because of Christmas vacation. Walking outside does something to my brain, it wanders ­– in a good way – and that’s usually when I start planning my next post. So, here we are.

As I was enjoying the sunshine, I started thinking about all the posts that I've already written and what driving analogies I may have missed. Then it dawned on me, with the new year starting and the images of gyms, news articles and opinion pieces, Facebook memes and pretty much any ad on TV or radio that inundates our subconscious with ideas that everyone’s New Year’s Resolution is (or should be) weight-loss, I decided that I would dive right into that saturated field and offer my own opinions on the subject. Please note that everything I state here is strictly my opinion and I have received no compensation for what I’m about to say!

For those who have decided that 2015 is going to be “The Year” of successful weight loss, I would offer this suggestion: treat it like Driver’s Ed. Before you went out to get your Driver’s License, you had to become familiar with the car and the rules of the road. For many of us, learning on our own or with the help of a parent was not enough, so we enrolled in Driver’s Ed and used the support of the teacher and other classmates to help us learn and eventually pass the test.

Starting this journey shouldn't be any different. There are some people who are successful at losing weight without any outside assistance, they are rare, but I don’t doubt they exist. I am not one of them. I need the support and the tools of my Weight Watchers group to continue my success. Now, I've changed a lot of habits over the years, so I’m not as dependent as I was in the beginning, but the right group or program will allow you to spread your wings. To be successful, you must be allowed to share, vent, support others, be supported, make mistakes, learn from those mistakes and never stop growing. Programs (like Weight Watchers or Shibboleth) and retreats (such as Green Mountain at Fox Run) that focus on education and support seem to be the most successful platforms. But ultimately, the program that is successful for you is the one in which you want to follow.

When you learn the proper driving techniques from qualified instructors, your driving record is usually better than someone who is just winging it. That’s not to say that you won’t ever get a ticket or be in an accident, but at least you have been given the tools to learn how to recognize the signs of dangerous road conditions. These groups operate in much the same manner. Just by attending the meetings doesn't guarantee that you will lose weight, you must take on the responsibility to use what you learn and not expect it to come without hard work.  I realize that sounds a bit preachy, and I typically try to keep everything here light-hearted, but I can’t stress enough that it is ultimately up to you to be successful in your journey. You can have the support of the entire planet, but you must be the one who puts the key in the ignition and starts the car. Knowing that you have the support of a driving instructor along for the ride should make things easier in the beginning, but the instructor is only there to impart her knowledge, you must be willing to absorb it and put it into action so that you take control of your own vehicle. After a while, you may find that you've mastered some of the techniques so well that you are willing to put yourself in the instructor’s seat for those newbies that are about to hit the road with their New Year’s Resolutions!

I hope that 2015 finds you happy and healthy and I encourage you all to enjoy your own Road Trip! You are worth the journey!

Navigating the Holidays

I’m sorry that I've been slacking, things are just crazy busy for me! Trust me, it’s not that I’m not interested in keeping my eyes on the road, I just haven’t had time to really focus on what matters, and that’s a most unfortunate thing. But now, with Thanksgiving behind us, Hanukkah starting last week, Christmas this week, culminating with the binge drinking and binge eating event otherwise known as New Year’s Eve, I just figured it was time to examine where I am on the map. After all, isn't the end of the year the best time for reflection? Looking at where you've been this past year in order to plan where you are going for next year.

I had to ask myself a few questions: 

Where have I been? Well, in 2014, I logged about 1846 miles worth of walking this year (with yet another week to go, I should end somewhere close to 1900 miles), hit my goal weight, had my story featured on CNN.com, appeared on the TV show “The Doctors” and was interviewed for Fitwoman.com, so all in all, 2014 was a great year. 

Where am I going? No one knows what the future holds, but I do know that I will be focusing more on my passion in 2015. This weight loss journey has not only inspired the birth of this blog, but it has also given me the spark I need to put myself out there as a writer. I expect that spark to grow into a much larger, brighter flame this upcoming year. I will most definitely be making time to nurture that spark in 2015! 

How do I keep moving forward? It’s not easy to stay on track, especially this time of year, but there are little reminders—road signs, if you will— that I come across on my journey. It’s those little signs that help me stay focused. For instance, at my meeting this past Saturday, one of my awesome meeting friends gave me a custom Christmas card telling me how I inspire her to continue on. It was the best feeling, knowing that what I've done, and continue doing, helps others. When I started back in 2011, my goal wasn't to inspire others, I was lucky if I could inspire myself, but as I have attested many times right here on this blog, I get my inspiration from those who surround me. That is how I keep moving forward! 

How do I navigate these holidays? I can’t believe it, but the Holiday season will be over before long and knowing that I have the tools and trusting in the awareness to keep my eyes on the road ahead is what helps me stay the course. One thing Margie the Magnificent is fond of saying is “they are called ‘HoliDAYS’, not ‘HoliMONTHS’!” Meaning, we are allowed to celebrate the day, but don’t let it continue on for the entire month of Octovember (also known as October, November and December)! We've all worked too long and too hard for a derailment this close to the end of the year.

I've found that self-reflection and self-awareness always seem to be my two best road trip buddies. Usually, I typically lose focus when I ignore who I am and what I’m doing. Self-doubt and self-recrimination are the worst possible traveling companions for any journey. The best thing I've ever done was leave those two along the side of the road somewhere, and never look back. Besides, I just didn't have enough room in the car to keep carrying them along. 

How will you answer the questions? Will you be able to find your spark in the new year? That is my Christmas wish for you...live your passion and may you never have a wasted day. 

I most likely will not be posting again until next year, so to all of you out there, have a very Merry Christmas and a brilliant and blessed New Year! 

Safe travels into 2015! Cheers!

You Don’t Have to Remain in the Fast Lane

So, way back when, as one of my earliest blog posts, I discussed how speeding isn't necessary. I remember that I wrote that, but so much has happened in the nearly 2 years since that post, that I had to go back and re-read it to ensure that I didn't repeat myself. While revisiting that stop along the Road Trip, it occurred to me that I really should go back and revisit my entire journey. Especially right now, with the holidays looming and end-of-year reminiscing, it just made sense that now is the time to look back. As the old saying goes, “those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it.”

I started this blog as a means of chronicling my struggles and successes, my trials and triumphs as I embarked on the (seemingly) overwhelming task of losing half my body weight. Now that I've achieved that goal, I continue to find little things along the way that inspire something down deep inside that I feel I should share. One such tidbit came from an unexpected source. As some of you know, my story was featured on CNN, and since then, I have been blessed with many opportunities, including being interviewed by FitWoman.com and even appearing on a segment of “The Doctors.” As it turns out, the unexpected source of inspiration came when someone from CNN reached out and asked if I would be interested in doing a follow up “Where Are They Now?” type story for January. It would coincide with people making New Year’s Resolutions. I sent back a quick response indicating that I would love to be a part of the New Year’s Resolution story and jotted down a quick piece of advice that I would offer someone making such a resolution: It’s not a resolution for a New Year, it’s a resolution for a New You. As soon as those words were staring back at me, I knew I had to translate that idea into a stop along my Road Trip.

 As you are driving along the interstate, it is tempting to want to hang out in the far left lane– the fast lane, as it were– in order to get where you’re going as fast as you can. It seems like a logical thought, but you can go too fast. When I talk about a New You Resolution, what I really mean is that thinking about the diet as a temporary activity will more than likely end in disappointment. For someone to get the desired results, it takes more than a casual “it’s a new year, I should lose some weight” passing thought. It takes a core desire to change what you've done your entire life and try something new. After all, if you want to be something you've never been, you have to do something you've never done. Overhauling your mind and body is not something to speed through. It took me 2 ½ years to hit goal and I learned a lot about myself during that time. If I had stayed in the left lane, pedal to the metal, there is no doubt I would have lost the weight faster, but I also may have gotten distracted and lost focus of the final goal. I’m not saying I wouldn't have been successful, but slowing down and appreciating the changes that I made helped me change old habits and create new ones. No one is timing you on your progress, so there is no need to rush through it. People often want instant gratification, but proper and healthy weight loss is not something that can be, nor should be, done overnight. It’s a long slow journey, but it is worth every mile!

An Open Road

So many things have happened over the last week, that there are no words!

Since the CNN Article was published, my life has been a near constant blur. But, I wouldn't change it for the world! I started my journey to be healthy and this blog to give me an outlet to talk about the pit stops as well as the green lights along the way. The interest that everyone is taking in my story is incredible, overwhelming and encouraging. I was even given the opportunity to talk with Fitwoman.com about my life changing experience (you can find a link to the interview HERE).

The road is wide open for me and I am trying to soak it all in. I also want to thank everyone who has been reading the blog all along and welcome those of you who may have just found it. I am excited to continue my Road Trip and can't wait to see where the journey takes me!