I’ve realized something over the last (almost) four years…no
matter how well you succeed in striving to hit a goal, you are always comparing
yourself to others who have “done better.”
But what does “done better” really mean? Does it mean that someone lost
more weight than you? Does it mean someone lost it quicker than you? Does it
mean that someone makes more money than you? Well, since we are all human and
all in the habit of comparing ourselves to friends, family and co-workers who
surround us (and in some cases, we find ourselves making comparisons with
people whom we’ve never even met).
There are some good things that can come from these types of
comparisons, but for the most part, comparing any accomplishments we make with
those of other people is downright useless. I was talking with a neighbor at
the grocery store the other day. I noticed that he has lost quite a bit of
weight. I know he’s been working on it, as he was attending Weight Watchers
meetings periodically and I’ve also seen him walking up and down the main road
outside my neighborhood. But I hadn’t seen him in a while, so his weight loss
was dramatic and noticeable. Now, I know it can be tricky to mention weight
loss to someone, but given the fact that I knew he’d been working on it, I
would be remiss not to say something.
He thanked me and told me he’d lost about 50 pounds. I congratulated him. Unfortunately,
he didn’t leave it there. He went on to compare his accomplishment to mine. I
could tell he felt bad that he hasn’t lost as much as I have. He needs to take
his own journey, and I told him as much. What he did is a huge accomplishment!
He should be shouting it from the rooftops, he should be encouraging others –
who are interested – to come along for the ride. He should not be bummed that
he hasn’t done what I’ve done.
Now, I have a confession to make. I have to work on this
problem with myself! I do look at others who have done more, done it quicker or
done it better and I wonder what I could have done differently to change my
path. But then, I get random Facebook messages out of the blue from a
nationally known magazine and I realize that it doesn’t matter the road that
others have taken, because I took the road that I was supposed to take and I
am where I’m supposed to be. Sometimes that road was less traveled, but
other times it was a full-on traffic jam, but the entirety of that road was
mine to travel as I saw fit.
So, I will work on making sure that I don’t try to hitchhike
onto someone else’s Road Trip, but I will make sure that I support and
encourage everyone along the way. And I hope that you will do the same, because
when we all get to where we’re going, it should be one helluva party!
